By: Mike Newkirk
The Bible is full of stories. Stories are a primary vehicle that our Creator God uses to teach us about reality; the realities of who He is and who we are and what will come to pass. No surprise about that assertion. The Apostle Paul told us that in 1 Corinthians 10:6-11.[i] And stories, ours and others, are how we still learn.
One of the most compelling stories I have heard in recent years is the story of Rosaria Butterfield’s conversion to belief in Jesus Christ. Dr. Butterfield first wrote her biography, The Secret Thoughts of an Unlikely Convert, in 2012 (expanded version in 2014). She explains why she wrote it:
“I am often asked to share my spiritual journey. People are interested to know what it is like to travel a long journey to Christ. I am not hesitant to oblige. How our lives bear the fruit of Christ’s spilled blood is important. The stories of our lives can serve to encourage and warn others.”[ii]
Her story of conversion from a tenured professor at a major research university and an activist in the LGBTQ community to a follower of Christ, pastor’s wife, and home-schooling mother of four is dramatic and emotional yet logical and intellectual. Since I read her first book, I have had the chance to meet her and hear her story first hand several times. I learn something new each time. In several addresses, paraphrased, she identified her primary offense against God as unbelief not her homosexual lifestyle even though she saw that as sinful too. And she said this unbelief was driven by her pride. The first and greatest commandment Jesus said was to love the Lord God with all your heart, soul, and mind. [iii] Jesus also said that if you love me you will keep my commandments.[iv] Therefore, it follows that if I disregard what He has declared about anything then I am not loving Him. I am loving myself. I am following myself. What I want. What I think is acceptable. At that point I am not believing Him but choosing my prideful and arrogant way.
The reason her statement impacted me was the realization that I am the same. One of the passages in the Bible that most frequently comes to my mind is what the man in Mark 9:24 said, “I believe; help my unbelief!” And yes, I also resonate with her declaring that at the root, unbelief linked to pride, is the real issue with my sinfulness. It makes me defensive when criticized although He has said He will defend me. It makes me critical of others when He has said to be gracious and loving. It makes me worried and anxious when He has clearly said He will never leave me nor forsake me and works all things for my ultimate good. I could go on.
I would encourage you to get her books or at least her testimony. This YouTube video of one of Dr. Butterfield’s talks captures the essence of her journey. She is a dear sister in Christ who is a gifted and compelling communicator.
[i] 1 Corinthians 10 6 Now these things took place as examples for us, that we might not desire evil as they did. 7 Do not be idolaters as some of them were; as it is written, “The people sat down to eat and drink and rose up to play.” 8 We must not indulge in sexual immorality as some of them did, and twenty-three thousand fell in a single day. 9 We must not put Christ to the test, as some of them did and were destroyed by serpents, 10 nor grumble, as some of them did and were destroyed by the Destroyer. 11 Now these things happened to them as an example, but they were written down for our instruction, on whom the end of the ages has come.
[ii] Butterfield, Rosaria. The Secret Thoughts of an Unlikely Convert (Kindle Locations 74-76). Crown & Covenant Publications. Kindle Edition.
[iii] Matthew 22:37 And he said to him, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. (ESV)
[iv] John 14:15 “If you love me, you will keep my commandments.